My Strong Little Girl

When Lynn and I felt the call of God to go to seminary, we believed He was leading both of us to attend at the same time. It required numerous sacrifices, but God was gracious, and we found ways to adjust our schedules. One challenge was that we already had two toddlers — and discovered our third child would arrive before the end of our first year.

The seminary had a preschool program, and we were able to enroll Tanya, who was three going on four, and Daniel, who was two. Each morning we dropped them off before heading to class. The program was wonderful for the children, and they loved it. The day‑care facility was sponsored by the seminary for seminary families and also served as a training center for students preparing for preschool ministry.

One unique feature was a hidden viewing room where parents could watch their children through a mesh screen without being seen. On our way to or from class, Lynn and I would occasionally stop in to check on them. They always seemed happy and busy.

Every afternoon the children had nap time. Tanya, however, never slept. Instead, she quietly occupied herself, teaching herself to tie her shoes and put on her coat. Daniel, on the other hand, crashed hard every day and slept deeply for two hours.

We loved our children and had great hopes for them. Because Tanya was our oldest — and a girl — I encouraged her to be independent and a self‑starter. I wanted my children to become leaders, not simply followers. Each day when we picked them up, the teachers gave us a quick report. I loved hearing how they played, what they learned about God, and how they were beginning to understand colors, shapes, and numbers.

But one day, the teachers told us they were having a “little problem” with Tanya. Naturally, we were concerned.

“What’s the problem?” I asked.

They explained that Tanya was being “a bit bossy” and suggested we observe her during playtime. So we did. When the children went outside, we saw something remarkable. Tanya gathered all the children around her and announced what game they were going to play. When one child objected, Tanya calmly told her she could sit on the side while everyone else played. To our amazement, the children followed her instructions without hesitation.

I was conflicted. I wanted Tanya to be a leader — but perhaps she was starting a little early.

In time, Tanya grew into a strong, capable leader. I know she could be a handful for her husband and that she sometimes made life challenging for him, but he loved her deeply. He chose a strong, smart woman to stand beside him in the ministry God had called them to share.

Back in 1976, when my daughter was labeled “bossy,” I could not have predicted who she would become. But even then, I admired her strength and character — just as I do today. Tanya helped her Husband, Andy plant a strong, dynamic church in Delaware, by focusing on children and family ministries.

The Lord took my beautiful little girl home far too early. She barely made it to 50 years of age before being overcome by cancer.  She has left a deep void in our hearts, yet the impact of her life continues to be seen in the many people she touched during her short time on earth.

God teaches us the importance of raising our children in the way they should go. I have been blessed by the godly children He has given me. I would love to take credit for their choices, but it is their love for Jesus that shaped who they became — and it is their faithfulness that has blessed me so richly.

FOOD FOR THOT!

How can we help our children to become strong in their faith and choose to serve Christ as they become adults?

Are we setting examples for our children and youth on how to live for Christ?

Perhaps we need to spend more time on our knees praying for our children?

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Blessings and Memories:

Recently my wife, Lynn and I had the opportunity to reconnect with the “Best Man” from my wedding, Woody Rubino and his wife Ann. We were able to spend the night with them in their beautiful home in North Carolina. It was a sweet reunion and I was thrilled to see how God is using them in ministry through their church and to review what has been happening in our lives in the intervening years. Woody and I graduated together from the Naval Academy with the class of 1971, he went on to make a career of the Navy, while I finished my requirement with the Navy and went into full-time ministry. We served together on the Naval Academy Gospel Team while at the academy and we discovered that we serve a mighty God. Woody recently read one of my latest stories from my Website and sent me the attached email. I was extremely moved by his letter and asked him if I could share it with others. I trust that it might be as inspirational to you as it was to me.

I enjoyed reading your website. Not only was it good to see how God has blessed your life over the years, but the article about the car brought back many memories of our Academy days for me. I can still vividly remember when I first met Jerry our plebe year. He walked into my room at the Naval Academy and asked if I could use help getting my shoes to shine. I was having great difficulty shining them, and he showed me how to put them under hot water, get dull polish off, then start a new spit shine from scratch. Then he invited me to Bible studies you and he were having. At the time I was amazed anyone knew multiple Bible verses from memory. I accepted the Lord over spring break that year. I was the first one in my family to do so, but my parents and brothers eventually did also. Today, my brothers, my son, my grandchildren, and all my nieces and nephews (except one) and their children are actively involved in Church and serving God. My youngest brother also went to the Naval Academy, then resigned from the Navy and went to the Evangelical Presbyterian Seminary in Philadelphia. He served as an assistant Pastor for several years before entering Civil Service. My other brother served on the staff of a large Baptist Church operating the sound system for many years. His daughter's husband works for the Alliance Defending Freedom and often writes different articles for them. That is a lot of lives changed for the glory of God. But it all began with an offer to help shine my shoes and the Bible studies you and Jerry were having. So, when I think about those gospel team trips we took in your station wagon, I am sure the real miracle wasn’t just in God’s provision, but in the lives being touched.  I’ll continue to check your website for new updates.    
Woody

Being Moved by the Spirit

I have already shared stories about the strange events that happened in our church services at Ocean City Baptist Church. But there are so many funny stories to tell, that I want to share another. Early on at the church we lived in the parsonage directly behind the church building. We were trying to figure out how to minister in a church that was one block from the boardwalk of the premier summer resort community of Maryland. It was a very seasonal ministry and far different than the rural Southern Baptist churches I was familiar with. The summer months were filled with thousands of visitors who we felt called to reach. Being part of the Southern Baptist denomination, we felt that we had a great resource for getting help to reach these tourists to Ocean City. With a membership of about 40 people we could not possibly do such a huge task on our own. So we put out the word that we would host church mission teams who would come to Ocean City for a week at a time to minister to this very special resort community.

Surprisingly, we had lots of youth mission teams volunteer to come and assist us. We did not know what to do with them so we simply asked them to come and perform in our church. For the first two summers we pastored in Ocean City, the primary ministry we did was entertainment. We had youth choirs, youth puppet teams, and lots of skits. So practically every night of the week, we opened the church doors and had a concert, puppet show, or skit in the church sanctuary. We invited people on the streets, the boardwalk, and through the local newspapers to come into the church for the entertainment.

This was quite a change from what the church had been doing before our arrival. Opened only in the summer months before we came, the church had a coffee house ministry in the basement of the church and a hotline for crisis situations. Needless to say, the change didn’t always go over as well as we would have liked but we were experimenting and learning how to be the church we needed to be in our community.

One Monday night in the middle of July we had a terrific group of young people singing in the sanctuary. We had quite a mix of visitors in the church that had come to hear them sing. The program had just started and I decided to sit in the back near the front door when one of our former crisis cases from the old coffee house days slip into the service. I had spent time with him before and knew that he was not happy that we had stopped the coffeehouse. I also knew that he had a drinking problem.  He looked like he had been drinking so I slipped into the pew behind him just to keep an eye on him. The youth choir was really very good and everyone seemed to be enjoying the music.  Then I noticed that our new guest kept slipping down in the pew and looked like he was drinking something. I looked over the pew and saw that he had brought a bag with a bottle of whiskey wrapped inside it. I reached over the pew, grabbed the bag, slipped out of the church, and tossed it into a trash bin. I returned to the church and realized that he never even noticed that his bag was gone. After a few more minutes of the music, he stood up and slipped out the door. I figured he had gotten bored and needed to get another drink, so he would be gone.

Then about three minutes later he came back. This time he wandered all the way to the front of the church where he found a seat and sat down. He stayed there for almost ten minutes and then stood up again and meandered out of the church. Ok, I thought, “Now he is done and won’t be back.” But to my surprise, about five minutes later, there he was again walking slowly down the aisle right back to his seat where he sat for another ten minutes. Once again he got up and headed towards the exit. Obviously, everyone was watching him now. I figured he had another bottle stashed outside somewhere and he was going back to get another sip. I met him at the door and stepped out with him. I told him I was glad that he had come to the service and hoped he would stay, but then I explained these kids had worked very hard preparing this musical presentation and his coming in and out was very distracting and not fair to the rest of their audience tonight. He apologized and said he be more discreet from now on. He did come back one more time and stayed for most of the program but left right before the end.

I didn’t think much more of the incident and when the program was over I stood at the back door as folks were leaving. I thanked people for coming and invited them back for church worship services. Two elderly ladies spoke to me as they were leaving, “Oh wasn’t it wonderful!” To which I replied, “Oh yes, these young people do a great job. They have worked very hard to prepare this musical.”

“Oh, yes, we enjoyed them very much, but we were talking about the man who kept leaving the service, but the Spirit just kept bringing him back,” they said to me.

I laughed at my own thoughts as they said this. I wasn’t so sure that it was the Spirit that was bringing him back as much as some other spirits that kept taking him out. Then I realized how cynical I was becoming, I suppose from dealing with crisis cases on such a regular bases. I needed the Lord to remind me to become more spiritually minded as I dealt with people who came into our church. These two little ladies saw the situation in a much wiser way, even if some would consider their perspective as somewhat naïve. We serve a big God and He cares about all of His creation, so much so that He sent His precious Son to die for our sins. I think I have learned to become more discerning, to recognize that God IS drawing people to Himself, even those that most of us have given up on. I pray, “Lord, help me to be less cynical and more appreciative of how you are at work in the hearts of those who need you most.”

Questions for Reflection:

1. Have you become cynical of the world because of how you have witnessed events in your life and the apparent conditions of the world?

2. Is it time to recognize that we serve a loving God who cares so much for this messed up world, that He was willing to offer His Son as the final sacrifice to redeem us from our sin and our skepticism?

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. (NASB)